‘The Real Housewives of Orange County’ housewhore housewife Gretchen Rossi and her boyfriend, Slade Smiley, hit up the Mr. Bones Pumpkin Patch in West Hollywood, California the other day.  Rossi showed up wearing daisy dukes, boots, and an orange shirt that showed off her stomach.  Clearly, that is what EVERYONE wears to the pumpkin patch!   

Gretchen is soooo desperate to be seen!  She wants to be sexy…ugh!  Can’t she give it up?!  She needs to

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Lynne Curtin, from The Real Housewives of Orange County, and her family received an eviction notice on their Capistrano Beach home in late May.  They were supposed to be out of their ”rented” home August 27; however, they have not moved out as of yet.  (Side note: This IS the home that Lynne appeared to be living in last season.  She never owned the home…only rented it!)

According to court documents, Lynne and her husband had a writ of possession, or a five day eviction notice, served to them from their landlord in late May for an unpaid amount of $13,480 in rent and damages in Dana Point.  So, basically, law enforcement may be removing this family from this home very soon!   

I thought these people were supposed to be rich??  If they can’t afford $13,480, they aren’t rich!  Do they need me to help them out?  Perhaps Lynne could ask Gretchen for the money!!  Hell, Lynne should be kicked off that show, and I should be her replacement!  I can afford that shit…and I look much better than old ass Lynne!  Producers of The Real Housewives of Orange County: Call me!!

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These top 10 celebrities are related to Mr. Ed! 

I have gathered ten celebrities that are from the family Equidae.  These celebrities look very horse-like! 

10. Jennifer Garner

9. LeAnn Rimes

8. Tori Spelling

7. Haylie Duff

6. Hilary Duff

5. Gretchen Rossi

4. Ted Danson

3. Lauri Waring Peterson

2. John Kerry

1. Sarah Jessica Parker

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Gretchen Rossi…the real fake bimbo of Orange County!  What has she been up to since her fake fiance died?!?  Well…A LOT!  Bitch has been hanging out with Slade Smiley, who is going BROKE!  She has been getting ready for the Gumball 3000, and she has been getting PISSED off about photos on TheDirty.com.  Let me just say…the photos are AWESOME! 

This site has photos of Gretchen Licking Another Female’s Breast, Gretchen topless on a couch, and Gretchen on the toilet.  Gretchen’s lawyers have fired off a cease and desist letter to the site demanding the pic’s removal.  However, the pictures have not been removed, and I doubt they will be.  Gretchen CLAIMS (lies) that her camera was stolen, and this is how the pictures have been leaked.  However, that is not the case.  Apparently, people are sending in photo’s of her, because they HATE her!  Awesome!!  Gretchen spends way too much time getting drunk, acting a fool, and on the internet!  Yes, Gretchen has also contacted me!  She doesn’t like the negative stories, but she will just have to get over it!  She is pathetic!  You are the center of our world…right Gretchen?!?!  LOL!  Anyway…to check out these pictures of a pathetic excuse for a human…CLICK HERE!

I hope BRAVO doesn’t invite this loser back on the show! 

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This is our second piece on Plastic Surgery!  Most stars have had a little nip and tuck, a few have decided to age gracefully, and others have gone all out with plastic surgery!  It really is amazing how great most of these people look after they get a surgical procedure done.  Although you might not be able to tell right away and the celebs never admit it, old photo’s always tell the truth! 

10. Sarah Jean Underwood: Clearly, she had a nose job.  I thought her nose before was fine, but whatever she wants to do to make her feel better!  I love Sarah Jean Underwood, so I still think she looks fabulous!

9. Hilary Duff:  Ahhhh…she messed with her teeth again!!  She got those horse teeth filed down!  It looks much better and fits better with her face.

8. David Beckham:  Nose job…and got those teeth fixed!  Wow…he looks much better!  I bet Victoria has turned him on to Botox as well!!

7. Jennifer Aniston: We all know Jennifer had her nose done, but I think she has had breast implants!  They are much more perky!  Plus, her nipples are ALWAYS hard!  I think she got a very small implant…under the muscle.

6. Katie Price (a.k.a. Jordan): Nose job!!  She looks much better!  Besides…she probably got bored with filling in her lips and doing botox.  The nose is better!

5. Aubrey O’Day:  Aubrey clearly got breast implants and a nose job.  She just recently got her lips injected with crap too!  Her new lips look awful, but girlfriend needed the boobs!!  And…thank God she stopped wearing her hair like a skunk!

4. Carrot Top: Nose job and lip injections.  Plus, he is pretty built.  I would say he probably had some implants placed in other body parts.  But….he is still EWWW!!!

3. Lady Gaga: She got her nose done, lips done, and it appears maybe even a chin implant.  She looks much better!  Plus, the hair is looking better!

2. Gretchen Rossi:  The before picture is of Gretchen in her college days.  Oh…My …Gawd!  Ew!  She had a nose job, her lips done, cheek implants, and perhaps something done to her chin.  Plus, it looks like she lost a ton of weight!  And… I am assuming she got her teeth fixed!  I knew she was fake, but I didn’t know she was THIS fake!

1. Joan Rivers:  Ok…what hasn’t Joan gotten done?!  She has had her eyes done, her lips done, a nose job, etc!  I used to HATE Joan Rivers, but she is really growing on me.  I think she is doing pretty well in Celebrity Apprentice!

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So…did anyone catch the finale of The Real Housewives of Orange County season four??  Gretchen Rossi got a motorcycle from Jeff.  Vicki Gunvalson bought herself a Rolex.  Tamra’s husband bought her a bracelet for her birthday.  Jeana Keough went on a date and was rude to the cowboy.  Lynne Curtin tried to convince her daughter not to be such a loser, but obviously that didn’t work out.  Jo de la Rosa and Slade Smiley made an appearance.  Jo looked awful with her “bangs.”  She is such a loser!  Slade looked like a homo according to Tamra.  Lauri Waring Peterson showed up, and my heart goes out to her because her son is a problem child. 

I swear…I am addicted to this show!  Some of these women are just assholes.  Gretchen bought all the women little gifts, and of course Vicki and Tamra made fun of that.  They are so RUDE!  Tamra Barney also made a comment about the relationship between Gretchen and her fiance, Jeff.  Tamra said:

“I don’t know if I trust Gretchen.  A lot of her stories don’t add up.  We don’t believe Gretchen is dating this guy.  He’s paying her to take care of him.  I do believe they have a relationship of convenience.”

Oh …Hell No!!  There’s about to be a what???  A girl fight!!  Next week on the reunion show, I bet Gretchen and Tamra will have it out!  I think Gretchen is a total gold digger who didn’t really give a shit about Jeff, but Tamra is ruthless!  Although, I guess I am too, so I should probably be siding with the hag. 

Lauri is the only housewife worth anything.  She is the only one who doesn’t constantly talk about money.  You can tell she has real problems  Lauri needs her own show!

BTW: Can someone please beat the shit out of Jo??  She looks so stupid. 

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I am a serious fan of The Real Housewives of Orange County.  Why?  I have no idea.  You get no educational value from the show, but it is seriously entertaining sometimes.  I love watching these crazy women.  It is like a show on what not to do when you are a rich housewife.  I am picking up a lot of tips!

Anywho, for those of you who are also fans, what the FRICK is up with Gretchen?!  Tamra decided to throw a dinner party for her “friends.”  However, the whole night was about getting Gretchen wasted.  Tamra told Vicki she wanted to get Gretchen drunk so she would act stupid, and that is clearly what happened.  Ryan, Tamra’s loser son, spent the night playing bartender and serving up tequila shots to Gretchen.  He also kept his eyes glued on her.

Couple of things: Why the hell is Gretchen out partying again??  Her fiance, Jeff, is in the hospital dying??!?!  He was in the ICU a couple of weeks ago when she decided to go to the lake with her family and party.  Gretchen is a gold digger who could care less about Jeff.  If she gave a shit, she wouldn’t be so worried that she wouldn’t be able to have any fun.  She continues to tell everyone that if they were in her position they would understand.  I was in her position.  My father almost died last year.  He was in the hospital forever!!  My mother NEVER left.  She was there every damn day.  She never got a break.  You don’t get breaks.  When someone is your life and they are dying, you don’t take a break for yourself.  She is a total bitch.  (BTW:  Jeff, Gretchen’s fiance, passed away during the taping of the show). 

Another thing:  Why is Tamra being such a bitch?  She is such a shit starter!  Ryan was all over Gretchen…it was so gross.  Why didn’t anyone say anything about that?  GROSS! 

Gretchen then goes into the bathroom with Ryan.  She probably cheated on Jeff with Ryan.  Why? Because Gretchen is a total gold digging whore.  She is official TRASH in my book.

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