Well, this will depress you! 

Kristin Cavallari makes more than YOU!  And worse than that…LO Bosworth makes more than YOU!  Pathetic!

The Hills is returning tonight!  However, Lauren Conrad won’t be returning and in her place will be the infamous Kristin Cavallari!  I think Kristin will actually make the show better.  Lauren was boring.  What is really sad about this scripted show is the income these actors get!  I mean it is pathetic!  Here we are in a depressing economy, people are getting laid-off left and right, and some MTV idiot decided to pay these kids a boat load to do some bad acting on a “reality” show!  That is just SAD!  Nobody should watch this … just on principle! 

I mean … these kids didn’t even go to college, and they are making more than CEO’s right now!  They don’t even have any skills! 

Lauren Conrad - $125,000 per episode (her contract also stated that nobody on The Hills could make more than her)
Kristin Cavallari - $90,000 per episode
Heidi Montag - $100,000 per episode
Audrina Patridge - $100,000 per episode
Lo Bosworth - $100,000 per episode
Spencer Pratt - $65,000 per episode
Brody Jenner - $45,000 per episode

I mean are they seriously worth all of this?!  I’m gonna say…NO!  Just think…they do approximately 20 epidsodes per year.  That’s gross!  I think I could do some scripted work for half of what they pay those kids!  Call me, MTV!

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I have decided to add something new to Celebrity Royale!  I have decided to pick tweets from certain celebrity Twitter accounts and share them with you!  If you are on Twitter, add Celebrity Royale!   

Holly Madison wrote on Twitter: but i won’t sleep b4 telling @johnnykatz that i love Luv-It Custard. we must gp there 2gether

Miley Cyrus wrote: Spending time with Jesus.

Khloe Kardashian wrote: sooo for those of you thats up and cant sleep. What should we do?

Aubrey O’Day wrote: Don’t get caught up in the chaos of life, remember that you are as happy as you make your mind up to be!

Sarah Silverman wrote: If you ask me I think that date rape pill does more harm than good.

Brody Jenner wrote: Hard to see but those are all American flags… Crazy

Taylor Swift wrote: Caitlin just learned the valuable life lesson that motion censor sinks are awesome until you want to put your purse down in the sink. Kids..

John Mayer wrote: Jay-Z is better at soundcheck than most artists are during their show.

Sara Jean Underwood wrote: Goooozle chop!!!!!

Lauren Conrad wrote: …Is this when I start calling friends and asking if i can come over and take a shower? Awkward.

Adam Levine wrote: Continent hoppping is getting the best of me. I THINK I’m awake. I THINK the carpet is yelling at me.

NeNe Leakes wrote: Waking up n Cali! It’s finally time 2 pack my stuff 4 my trip home 2 the A! Yeah babe

Hugh Hefner wrote: It’s 9:15 & the girls and I are on the way to the airport for our flight to Toronto.

Be apart of the Celebrity Royale Twitter world!!! CLICK HERE!

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Joe Francis beat up Brody Jenner’s girlfriend, Jayde Nicole, last night! 

Brody Jenner and Jayde Nicole were at Guys and Dolls nightclub early this morning in Los Angeles when all the trouble started!  Jayde witnessed Joe Francis hitting on his ex-girlfriend.  Apparently, Jayde got all up in his business and got pissy about this.  Therefore, she thought it would be appropriate to throw her drink on him!  Well, Joe freaked out!  He pulled Jayde’s hair, punched her in the face, threw her to the ground and started kicking her.

Security stepped in, and they took Joe out of the club.  Brody followed and yelled at Joe.  Brody was then kicked out of the club as well.  After trying to get back in the club and failing, Brody saw Joe and punched him in the face.  Brody was immediately tasered by someone, and Joe managed to get away from all the drama. 

The police are currently looking for Joe Francis.  Jayde Nicole is saying she wants to press charges against Joe.  Jayde has a black and blue cheek, her face is swollen, she has a bruised left rib and her lower abdomen is sore.  Also, some of her hair got pulled out.

Brody Jenner posted a message on Twitter today saying, “Joe Francis beat up my lady this morning for no reason!  Pulled her to the ground, punched & kicked her…what does that say about him.  How can you call yourself a man when you beat up a girl??  Joe Francis is a piece of sh*t.  Joe Francis needs to be in jail!!!”

A couple of things: First, why the hell did Jayde feel the need to step into Joe’s situation and throw her drink?  I feel that was uncalled for!  She is just a stupid biotch!  She thinks she can do whatever she wants because she was in Playboy…big deal!  Second, clearly Joe Francis has issues.  Who beats up a girl?!  Third, charges should be brought against Joe for beating up Jayde, AND Brody for punching Joe!  Two wrongs do NOT make a right!  It doesn’t matter how cute it is to stand up for your girlfriend and punch out some dude for her….you cannot hit someone else! 

These fools probably need to grow up and stay out of the club.  Jayde already got into a fight with Audrina Patridge over Brody…can’t she get along with anyone?!

Below is a photo of Brody Jenner & Jayde Nicole.

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Brody Jenner is sooo in love with Playboy Model Jayde Nicole.  He goes through women like Michael Jackson goes through noses.  According to a recent interview, Jenner said Jayde Nicole was “the one!”  He has also said, “she’s everything he wants in a girl - loyal, honest, and beautiful inside and out.”

When Jenner was asked what he thought about his girlfriend having nude pics all over the place, he said, “I would have no problem with knowing people can see her nude pics because anybody can look, but to actually be with that person is what counts.”

He is so 15 years old.  I bet he looks at nude pictures of her with his friends when she isn’t around.  He is just that big of a loser.  I can totally tell he goes around bragging to his friends he got laid by Jayde Nicole. 

He probably is like the worst kisser, but girls continue to date him because of his name.  I think Brody is so lame.  He looks like he would need a good scrub in a shower and a toothpick after dinner.  He really makes me ill.

Here is a photo of Brody and Jayde leaving Apple Bar in Los Angeles, California.  She is trying to cover her face because she is so embarrassed. 

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1. Which supposedly clean-cut Wag has a white powder habit she can’t shake? She’s forever nipping into the ladies on nights out for a quick fix…
2. Lunch break for the crew on The Hills allows this drug dealer to make his way unnoticed into the house of one of the male stars of the show. Oh, and he comes over everyday. Sometimes more than once a day. OK, he also takes care of one of the female stars as well, but the male star passes it along to her.

My thoughts: Ok…I think #1 is Victoria Beckham.  She has lost weight over the years, and how the hell does she stay super thin?!?  By the way, for those of you who don’t know, a wag is an acronym used by the British tabloid press to describe Wives And Girlfriends of the England National Football team.  Victoria is overly clean cut.  The only other person I think it could be is Cheryl Cole.  She is a singer in the girls group, Girls Aloud.  Cheryl is also married to Ashley Cole, a football player in England.  She has more of a bad girl rep than Victoria though.

As for #2, I am not so sure it is Spencer and Heidi.  Everyone would assume it was Spencer, since he is like the main guy on the show.  They also shoot regularly at his house, but wouldn’t the blind item say something more about it being a co-owned house?  Heidi and Spencer live together.  So, I doubt if it was Heidi and Spencer.  Perhaps, Spencer obtains the drugs and gives some to his sister.  That could be reaching though.  Everyone knows Stephanie used to be into drugs heavily, so I doubt Spencer would provide drugs for her.  It is probably Brody.  He probably provides drugs for Lauren and her friends.  That makes more sense to me.  Brody does hang out with that new dude of Lauren’s, and I already pointed him out as a coke user.  Hell, I think everyone on The Hills does drugs (except maybe Whitney).

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Lauren Conrad, star from The Hills, looked pretty trashed on New Years Eve!!  She was trying to call someone, and it looks like she was concentrating pretty hard to dial!  Perhaps it was Stephen Colletti!!  Lauren has been seen making out with Stephen twice in the past week.   Whoever it was…they obviously didn’t answer their phone, because Lauren went home all alone.  Poor little Lauren…she isn’t loved.  Brody Jenner doesn’t really want her…he just wants to hit it!

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Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, stars from The Hills, have surprisingly called off their wedding! This is such a SHOCK!! NOT! I don’t think anyone really cares…nor do I think anyone really thought they were going to actually get married in the first place. So..whatever! I am sure this is just to spice things up for the next season of The Hills! That show is so fake…but I still LOVE IT! I think a great story line would be Lauren Conrad hooking up with Spencer! Or maybe Audrina and Brody getting it on!! Or Justin Bobby getting shot!! I could totally be a writer for that show!!!!

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Why is Nicole Richie eating lunch with Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge, stars from The Hills???  Nicole, Lauren, and Audrina dined at Joan’s On Third in L.A.  I’m guessing they all met through Brody Jenner.  Lauren is like best friends with Brody, and Nicole used to date Brody.  It’s all very confusing.  You would think Nicole had better friends to hang out with than the loser girls from that fake show (definitely not reality) The Hills. 

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Apparently Jessica Simpson, 27, is too good for Brody Jenner! Jenner,24, reportedly tried to hit on Simpson at hot New York nightclub Tenjune, and she totally dissed him. She wouldn’t even talk to him! I guess Simpson thinks she’s above the “Princes of Malibu” reality star or perhaps she thinks he’s dating Lauren Conrad (LC) from “The Hills.” He is a bit of a loser…..just CLICK to READ MORE!!!

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